Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Fruit pastilles.

So I had a slightly later start this morning - and this pleases me for two reasons.

1. I get to listen to a different variant of the Breakfast Show on Radio 2. I'm a big fan of the radio but when you're commuting it is difficult to listen to it conveniently on a train with little reception. I usually catch the very first hour and then the last hour before moving on to sampling the delights of Ken Bruce a little later with Popmaster. My daily text message to my Dad is then emitted revealing just how badly I failed at answering the questions...

2. The school children are out. This is exciting for a couple of reasons, which I will turn into subclauses of this already established list -
a) I get to smile to myself at the hierachy and oh so important politics of the schooling years. Who's wearing what uniform and who's spending their lunch money on Dr Pepper in the morning.
b) LOLLIPOP LADIES. What a joy it is to have these luminous oestrogen goddesses back in my life. Who knew they still helped you cross the road when you're 23?! There is simply nothing better than approaching a road that you cross several times a day and being assisted across it just because it is between 8:30 and 9:30 when they are charged with the safety of this little patch of tarmac. Phenomenal. They will always ask how you are and wish you a nice day - which is frankly as much good cheer as you're likely to get all week with Londoners. What a brilliant start to the day.

I am off back to the West Country this weekend and the timing just couldn't be better quite frankly. I've found London to be a cruel mistress, the sort that shows you a fruit pastille and then whips it away before you've licked it. Or promises you a fruit pastille but then gives you a green one. Bastard. That's not to say she's not fun, she has fruit pastilles, she's just not always willing to hand them out willy nilly.

What on earth does willy-nilly mean?

Perhaps I'll give up all this working nonsense and become the world's first stand-up comedian lollipop lady? Only with fruit pastilles. I wasn't allowed fruit pastilles for a large portion of my childhood due to the sugar content. IT's now abundantly clear that this was probably a very good idea. VEry good indeed.

Folks I'm off to the doctors tonight to see about getting my back fixed - the old lapland injury just hasn't fixed itself. If it turns out I have been shrinking all this time because of it then prepare for giant Laura to reappear tomorrow all guns blazing. Or just happier with no pain and some fruit pastilles. Do doctors give out fruit pastilles?

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