This has probably been one of my most productive days in terms of things I have produced in my day. Productivity isn't usually my strong point - that is wondering about things and then hoping that no one can read my thoughts.
The fear that people can hear my thoughts is quite prevalent in my day to day life and I've realised it's probably not very healthy. The trouble is that once I'm worried people can hear my thoughts it then causes an utter cascade of thoughts I wouldn't want them to hear - like the whole 'don't think about pink elephants' thing.
It also occurred to me today, that when big coincidences happen in my life that answer questions I had or make me wonder if there's some sort of organisation in the chaos of the universe, I am far more likely to consider the idea that I'm living in a Truman show style world, than wonder if there's a God. I think this may mean I've reached my full potential for levels of self-involvement.
What this basically means is that my mind thinks the idea the world revolves around me is more likely than that there is a deity. Wow.
Even I didn't see this coming - and I am practically a god.
Today's been particularly successful - I've booked gigs, been offered an audition, worn slippers to work and refrained from replying to an email slating the play I've written for the Edinburgh festival and giving me several lengthy paragraphs of advice on how to 'fix' the problems. It's difficult to type through gritted teeth without the spelling coming out a bit cockney so I've not replied. I fact, I've deleted the email. This must show some sort of level of maturity? If I take a deep breath, really deep, I can almost say the line 'I appreciate your feedback, thanks for taking the time, however...' before my breath runs out and I want to switch on caps lock for maximum effect and say 'I SPEND 90% OF MY TIME THINKING ABOUT THIS SCRIPT AND JUSTIFYING EVERY LINE I AGONISED OVER SO WOULD YOU MIND PERHAPS READING IT MORE THAN ONCE OR EVEN SEEING A PERFORMANCE OF IT BEFORE YOU LAY IT'S FLAWS BARE AND SUGGEST I ALTER THE ENTIRE CONCEPT?'
Now...my levels of maturity seem to be waning and I really didn't want them to. I'll go back to my happy place or zen or whatever the hell it's called.
In other news I finished reading Stewart Lee's book today finally. It took me a long time, not because it's not great but just because I find it difficult to read footnotes. There.
I also decided I think paint shops should be called glossaries as it just makes far more sense and you know it.