Monday, May 9, 2011

And I Know It's Going To Be...

...A LOVELY DAY! LOVELY DAY, LOVELY DAY, lovely day...a lovely daaaaaaaaaaay!!!

Ta Dah!!! It's bloggyoke - my latest invention. I'm not sure it's going to catch on and I don't know how I monitor the effects of you guys joining in... so, erm, it might have been a bit of a failure. But - we can reminisce about it now, can't we... eh? Yeah?! We can be like, "Ah, do you remember back at the beginning of the blog? Yeah! When I was like - And I know it's going to be... - and then we all joined in - A LOVELY DAY! Wasn't it fun? Yeah. Those were the lines. Happy sigh."

What I'm doing is bonding us as a friendship group and giving us familiar territory that we will pretend was superb in 5 years when actually we were all a little confused and bored when it actually happened. Feel better? If you went to University you'll understand exactly what I'm talking about. If you didn't, just substitute University for Primary Schools and keeping crayons in your pants.

Yesterday I spent a delightful afternoon in Bromley watching a trashy American TV show called "Bridezillas". Now, I have a soft spot for television which I know isn't educational, isn't classy and isn't doing the world any favours... but I happen to enjoy it and it is my (tame) guilty pleasure which I won't give up. Not for you, not for anybody. But maybe for Gerrard Butler.

I find it hard to switch off (as regular readers might have noticed...!), I over-think most things and have a tendency to think myslef round in circles that hurt the brain after a while. Trash TV is one of the few things that allows me to shut off properly - I can happily while away an hour being completely stuck in the world of whatever I'm watching. Books don't do it, computer games don't do it - it's TV. Bridezillas has to have climbed fairly high on my list of shows that I'll now be tuning in to when there's a spare tub of icing to eat and an hour with nothing to plan in.

I have never ever felt so good about myself in my life. So what if I'm permanently single? I have manners! So what if I don't have the world's most important job - I know how to behave at an occasion so as not to humiliate my entire family! So what if I have legs like the human equivalent of a dachsund? I don't dress like I got attacked by a Lycra monster when I left my caravan! Brilliant!

How these women still have women around willing to be their bridesmaids (let alone browbeaten an equally horrendous man into marrying them) is anyone's guess! It's crazy! By the end of the episode you are half expecting the bride to burst into flames when she enters the church... out of the flames will run 100s of tiny demons who have been masquerading as the blushing bride this whole time. The demons then feast on the squirming corpse of the groom while the families gather round arguing over who gets the £250 from You've Been Framed.

I recommend this show to anyone who ever has moments of low self-esteem and/or enjoys just watching how people live and wondering what would have to happen in their own lives for life to reach this kind of level...

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